Sunday, October 5, 2008

It was All My Fault

It was a cold winter night. I was finishing up my hot chocolate, and getting ready to go to bed. This was the only time I did not have to replay the images of what I had done in my head. If only I had been more careful when I was driving. If only I had not been rushing to get to our friends house. If only I had left a few minutes sooner this never would have happened, He would still be here. Nothing will numb this pain, I dont even know myself anymore. Everyone tries to convince me that I should not continue to put the blame on myself, but I cannot accept that. Loud crashing noises, flashes of light, images popping out of nowhere consume my thoughts. The drugs help me to forget these things, but nothing will numb the pain and guilt that I feel inside. It is all my fault!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Good!